Recently I had the pleasure of being interviewed on Jacquie Capstick’s The Natural Reel Podcast. It was a lot of fun and in it I share a little bit about my personal history, life lessons I’ve learned, my philosophy and how I’m now learning how to balance my energy by accessing and allowing more of my feminine self to come forth! Below is a transcript of the show but if it’s more convenient, you can also WATCH this episode on my YouTube channel or LISTEN on my podcast, Awakening Aphrodite where you’ll most likely find me hanging out! 😉 Thanks for checking it out and I’d love to hear what you think!
Jacquie Capstick:
Hi, I’m Jacquie Capstick and this is The Natural Healing Reel. Today, I am excited to bring my guest Amy Fournier, who is a lifelong leader in the whole health industry with not just fitness, but the diet, the foods, the spirituality. She brings it all together and she’s been doing this for a lifetime and it’s quite impressive. So I would like to bring her in now. Hi Amy, thank you for coming on The Natural Healing Reel.
Amy Fournier:
Hello Jacquie, I’m excited to be here. Thank you.
Jacquie Capstick:
So I was just hoping that maybe you could fill in a little bit of what you want us to know about you. A little bit of your bio.
Amy Fournier:
Okay. Well gosh, where do we start? Right? A whole lifetime. How do I summarize my life? Well, right now I’m in Massachusetts and I pretty much divide my time between California, Miami and Massachusetts. Working my way out of Massachusetts most likely, because I certainly am a beach girl at heart and the winters are a little tough.
But I have been in the health wellness and self-development industries for probably about 30 years, over 30 years now. Through a myriad of reasons, not only some of my own personal health challenges, but always trying to kind of better myself and seek out help from people who are walking the walk and talking the talk and had the life and the body or the mindset or whatever it was that I aspire to have myself.
So it’s been quite a road of twists and turns and taking me in lots of different places, but I very much embrace the holistic nature of health and wellness and mindset and living in our environment, in our diet and the way we move our bodies and the way we think, and the people we surround ourselves with and all these things are going to determine the quality of our life and how we feel and how we look. So, school of hard knocks has taught me a lot. I still have a lot more to learn, but it’s been quite a fun journey so far.
Jacquie Capstick:
Yeah. That’s awesome, because I think you’re inspiring a lot of people on your journey as well. Right? And I think that for myself, I know that when we teach then we’re learning it on a deeper level. Right? We’re understanding. Yeah, so sharing that knowledge is so important, right? For ourselves and obviously for others that are open for the information.
Amy Fournier:
Absolutely! Now I teach my classes online through my virtual studio, but most importantly with my podcast Awakening Aphrodite, has been a huge new pivot for me, and a new direction and opening a lot of new doors and enabling me to share a lot of the stuff I’ve learned in my travels and meet new people and opened up a lot of new opportunities. So that’s kind of my current thing now is the podcast and my online classes.
I have a place in Miami that I used to live there and I’ve been going there for, oh my God maybe… I don’t even know, 15 to 20 years perhaps. Because I was born and raised North of Boston, which I can’t seem to figure out because I kind of don’t really fit in because I do not embrace the cold weather and all that. Probably not many people do, but believe it or not, I do know a lot of people who do like cold weather and it is not me.
So I kind of would try to gravitate toward Miami and the warmer beach. I’m a nature girl. I love to be outside. I love to be in nature. I love being with my bare feet on the earth and hiking or beach or just something of that nature. So I’ve always been going there, but my family and my work was up in New England. So I was always kind of torn and kind of popping around between the two.
And now I’ve been doing some work in California, not only with my coach and mentor, but a good friend of mine, and we’re doing a lot of great work together. If I had my way Jacquie, I’d probably live in California. I always thought I would. When I was in college, I went to my very first fitness and health convention in San Diego back in the late ’80s. I think it was the late ’80s.
And I’d never been to California, and again, I’m in college and it blew my mind. I was like, “I think I died and went to heaven”. San Diego was just gorgeous and I was like, “I am definitely living here, because over there’s the beach and over there’s the mountains and I’m in the middle. So I’m in heaven.” But it was on the other coast, and like I said, my family and all that, you know how it is, is from the East coast, so that dream never really happened. And instead I kind of defaulted and went to Florida, because that’s only a three hour plane flight.
I mean, that’s a very doable pop down, pop back up and maintain both worlds. Whereas, California is the other side of the country, different time zone. At least to this point it hasn’t panned out, but I’m very much toying with the idea of relocating out there now that my club in New England is now closed. I do have a lot more freedom and I’m seriously considering what my next step will be.
Jacquie Capstick:
Nice. I love California too. I have a very similar experience. I used to go down and take the hairstyling Vidal Sassoon kind of classes. Anyways, I fell in love with it, Santa Monica, and I just recently as a family went down to San Diego. And I hear you, there’s something about it, it’s very magical. But apparently they’re all moving out of there right now.
Amy Fournier:
Yes. I heard that too. And a lot of it is because of the pandemic and the government stuff and taxes are crazy, but I’ve been hearing that too. I mean, you have to pick your priorities. I mean, no matter where you live in the States, there’s good and bad. Right? I was talking to my mom about this just yesterday. I mean, if you’re in Florida during the winter is great, but then it gets pretty tough in July and August. It gets really hot and humid. I mean, New England’s the same way. New England is amazing. People don’t know, but our summers, it can get up to a 100 degrees. It can get high 90s, it can be like a heat wave and sunny and hot and absolutely gorgeous. But the winters, January, February are pretty tough in New England. It gets dark at three o’clock and it’s cold and freezing and all that kind of stuff. So I feel like everything in life you have to pick your battles. You have to really get clear on what’s important to you, and the rest you make a choice.
Jacquie Capstick:
Choice, yes. Choice is the big thing. Right?
Amy Fournier:
Make a choice. Yep. Something hard to learn. We always have a choice, whether we think we do or not, we have choice, because we have freedom of the thought, the way we think and the meaning we give something and how we frame it is choice.
Jacquie Capstick:
Well, and I think that they say that when we make those choices, making a bad choice can really take us down a whole other road, a whole other path. I’ve experienced that.
Amy Fournier:
Yes, as we all have.
Jacquie Capstick:
And they’re very important those choices.
Amy Fournier:
We all make mistakes, right? You go down that bad path, you made the wrong choice, but it’s not a death sentence. It’s like, “Okay, I’m learning.” And I think the problem comes when you keep making the same bad choices, right? It’s okay to make the bad choice and then learn from it, and that’s called wisdom. You learn from your mistakes and then you adapt and hopefully you don’t repeat it again. That’s the problem is when we get in these patterns where we keep doing the same thing, getting the same unwanted results, and we’re wondering why. It’s like, “Well, hello.” It’s a wake up call, right?
Jacquie Capstick:
Well, I think sometimes I know for myself that… And maybe you can let me know your experience with this. But it comes in different disguises. So sometimes we don’t recognize it as that same lesson or that same threat, because it looks different, it smells different, it tastes different, so this is not the same. I’ve made a different choice of going down this path now. But ends up being a piece of that thread.
Amy Fournier:
Yeah, it’s very interesting. Agreed.
Jacquie Capstick:
If you have that experience. Yeah.
Amy Fournier:
I do. And you know I really have the philosophy Jacquie that life there… I believe in a ultimate, divine benevolent force. A spirit if you will, that is ultimately love, and love in its most pure essence, and that force is what created everything. And that force always wants to help push us toward the truth, which is love and is always like a… I like to think of it as a loving parent, always trying to guide us toward that.
And unfortunately we go through a lot of pain sometimes to get there, but ultimately this force really just wants us to ultimately get there and the lessons can be disguised as uncomfortable and painful, but they’re all to eventually lead to that place. That’s my personal philosophy and whether it’s true or not, it’s helped me deal with a lot of crap.
Jacquie Capstick:
Yep. Yep. Well, it sounds like it’s a good philosophy to have. I think that what I’ve been learning as well, I believe very similar to you. But the other part that I’ve learned is that we’re a part of this, right? And so to connect in to the energies instead of always looking out, we’ve been taught to look out everything.
Amy Fournier:
Yes.
Jacquie Capstick:
And this way just grounding yourself and allowing in, asking for divine guidance, right? Protection, whatever it is that you need that day. But how can I be a service today is, how can I be my best version of myself as Joe would say. I love his little statements. And I think that when you feel that that’s the jam, right? Is when you tap into that and you get in that flow and it’s like the best feeling in the world. And then when you come out of it, and you get that contrast, it’s like…
Amy Fournier:
Yes, because I think the flow that you’re expressing is when you’re in alignment with source, when you’re in alignment with that ultimate divine love energy, it’s a flow, it’s a feeling of levity. And it’s that feeling that we don’t want to let go because we know we’re aligned. And body, mind, spirit is all in one place. And that’s why to me, the physical is an important component because, you can’t have the spiritual without the physical, because we’re all one. It’s all together and you can’t even access higher spiritual realms if your body hurts or your body doesn’t work quite.
I mean, ask anybody that has an ache or pain or an illness, it’s very distracting. You can’t elevate your spirit if your body isn’t on point. And I’ll also add to what you said that a lot of times the asking right, is very important. It’s very important that we ask step one, but I’ve learned too that I have to listen more and be patient about the listening.
Because we ask and we want the answer and it didn’t come yesterday, and they we’re kind of pissed that God’s not listening or whatever you want to call source. So not only do you have to really listen, which means you have to get still and quiet enough to hear, but also you have to be willing to be aware that the answer can come in ways that you weren’t expecting.
You have to really open up your heart, mind awareness to however that answer might come. It’s not going to be like an email from God, so to speak. You know what I mean? It might be an email from someone else that has… You know what I’m saying? It’s not going to be like the brick falls on your head and the seas part, and “Oh my God, there’s the answer”.
Sometimes the answer is a song on the radio or something someone says to you just in a certain way or a newspaper article lands on your desk, you know what I mean? Those can be the way the universe speaks to us, what our heart is longing for and a lot of times too the answers can be uncomfortable for people, because the answers we all like, because there’s something that’s going to require us to change our life and maybe make a hard change, whether that be a new relationship, a new job, something we should be doing that we know should.
So we got to be ready for the answer, because if you really want it, then you really have to accept the truth of what that answer’s going to be or live with the consequences of not accepting it.
Jacquie Capstick:
Yep, yep. That choice. The other thing I learnt about what you were saying, because I think that’s a common thing is that I’ve asked, I’m not hearing, everybody’s looking, right?
Amy Fournier:
Mm-hmm (affirmative).
Jacquie Capstick:
So I don’t think we’re supposed to look, we’re supposed to just ask and it is given. As soon as we’re looking then it moves it away from us, which was a very big understanding for me. Right? If you’re looking then you now are saying that your separate from it.
Amy Fournier:
Yeah, yeah, yeah. You don’t have it. If you’re feeling like you don’t have it yet, that means it’s separate than you.
Jacquie Capstick:
Again, my coaches they taught me to speak louder, be more… When you’re asking for something, okay, you need to show me in a way that I’m going to know, okay? Surprise me with it. But I want to know the answer and I’m going to know that it’s not. That’s a really fun thing to do. I’ll tell you why. It does come in, in a way that you just go, “Oh,” right? So asking again for more clarity, volume, because it is a soft little voice inside, right? It’s not as loud as the ego mind.
Amy Fournier:
Yeah. Sometimes that intuition really gives you a strong hit too. It’s just a different feeling, but it can be very powerfully strong as well as the soft whisper.
Jacquie Capstick:
I saw online that there was a panel and you guys were debating or discussing issues, women, divine feminine, and just really great valuable information that was being shared…
Amy Fournier:
The information on the divine feminine, all that stuff is my podcast. That’s my personal thing. But the CHEK Institute is what started me on my path down decades ago as just a personal trainer in fitness, and getting really educated as to how to properly work the body and exercise the body, and then I got certified. I went on to get the holistic nutrition coach, which brought in a lifestyle and diet component, which was essential.
But then since have kind of continued to educate myself of course, and expand my awareness into the esoteric and the spiritual and the environmental aspects of health and wellness, because my career I’ve been doing this over 30 years. So I’ve gotten a lot of different areas of things that affect our life. I mean, you can’t separate how you speak. It’s just as important. The thoughts you think is the food you eat. The thoughts you think are your mental diet, so to speak.
A lot of people have crappy mental diets. I don’t care how perfect your exercise program is and how on-point your diet is. If you’re thinking crappy, or you’re in a relationship that you don’t like, or it stresses you out, or you don’t feel safe and you can’t be your true self, you will never be happy and fulfilled. You will never achieve the level of self-actualization and fulfillment that most likely you aspire to.
You’ve got to look at all the aspects of who you are and what you are to be what you want to be. And I started my podcast because I’d been functioning primarily in my life- what helped me survive- was predominantly my masculine energy. I mean, not only do we live in a patriarchal society currently, which is changing, but I also grew up in a very masculine, dominant mindset type of family. And New England is also very much nose to the grindstone, don’t feel it, just do it and all that.
So I kind of have had to recalibrate myself and for several reasons kind of had like a midlife crisis of “Oh my God, I can’t do this anymore. I think I’m just going to blow up.” And had to recalibrate to bring more of my feminine qualities online. Now I’m a very feminine woman. I identify as a female, but I wasn’t living the traits of the female energy as much as I needed to be, which was the more vulnerable, the more quiet, the more relaxed, the more not doing and more being.
I’ve always been an overachiever and a make-it-happen and very ambitious, through different traumas that have happened. I’ve had to be very strong to get through it, which is valuable. But now I’m at a point in my life where I can breathe a little and now sit back and I have the ability to integrate all of who I am, because now I’m in a safe place to do so.
So that’s why I started my podcast because that has been quite a journey for me to explore as I evolve more of myself. And I’ve learned that, oh my gosh, there’s so many women that are in the same position. We’re living from our masculine. And let me just get very clear, not to just keep rambling here, but I just want to make sure everyone understands that one is not better than the other. And I talk about this in my show that masculine is not worse, feminine is not better. That’s not even the point.
The point is, is that we as human beings, regardless of how you identify, even if you’re a man and you identify as a woman, it doesn’t matter. Every human being has elements of both in them. We are all the masculine, the feminine, we are all the duality. It’s how we identify. And are they in balance? Are they working for you? Do you have the discretion to know when it’s best to tap into the masculine more for this particular situation or the feminine more?
I was operating in the masculine. I didn’t have a default to the feminine. I didn’t have access to that. It wasn’t even a part of my paradigm. So what I’ve learned is that you have to learn the discretion to know when is it time for me to be more soft? When is it time for me to listen and be receptive? And when is it time for me to get the job done and focus and get going and too bad if you feel like going to sleep type thing.
It was the wisdom to have the discretion to use them both to be a fully integrated human being that I’ve learned and that other people apparently need help learning too, and that’s why I started my podcast.
Jacquie Capstick:
Well, you know what? That’s incredible. What advice would you give somebody. Saying, “Okay. Well, how do I find that? How did you go about finding this divine feminine side of yourself? For somebody who’s just listening and just going, “Okay. Well, I’m not really aware that I’m doing that, but if she’s just found that, well how do I go about finding that?”
Amy Fournier:
Yeah, that’s a great question. Well, I guess how we find anything, right? Is we just start searching. Just start searching for the things that you’re looking for. I mean, I was just an avid reader of all kinds of books on masculine, feminine energy, awakening of the divine feminine, the sacred feminine. Even just a simple Google search or online courses, podcasts like mine, Awakening Aphrodite or just finding people who are doing it and who can educate you.
Right now I’m trying to get educated in women’s history studies and ancient women studies, because it’s been fascinating for me to learn that the female was not only revered and respected, but it was a prominent part of the culture that worked in cooperation with the masculine to make a whole balanced culture. It’s when the culture is predominantly masculine, it didn’t respect and incorporate the feminine that there was imbalance, which is where the situation we’re in now with our earth and our planet.
But to answer your question, I mean, you find it by learning from other people who have done it and what they do, and then emulating them and just following that trail of breadcrumbs, right?
Jacquie Capstick:
Yeah, yeah. Absolutely. If you could find someone.
Amy Fournier:
Yes.
Jacquie Capstick:
And Awakening Aphrodite is talking about it. And I think that is a really great thing is just to kind of listen, right? And kind of just catch the energy and the conversation. And I think that’s how you kind of tap into your own person.
Amy Fournier:
Yes. Well, there’s no question the best way to learn how to do anything, whether it be bake a pie, or build a building or learn a new dance step or lose weight or whatever it is, or to get over cancer or heart disease is find someone who’s done it. Right? As Tony Robbin says, “Success leaves clues”. You have to find someone who’s done it. That’s why support groups work. Right?
Wherever it be is, we find learning and comfort in other human beings and the wisdom of generations to pass down to others. So, if you want to find how to access your feminine more, then find those resources of people who are doing it, and learn from them, and then apply them to yourself and keep what works for you and toss the rest. It’s all just a discovery journey.
Jacquie Capstick:
Yeah. That’s great. That’s good. So, you were talking about this light and sound and of course that you took at this CHEK. Can you explain, that sounds really interesting.
Amy Fournier:
I’m glad you asked that because it sounds like I have to clarify a bit! It’s not part of the CHEK Institute yet, but what it is, is that there’s new science that actually came out of Egypt. Well, it’s actually not new, but it’s new because a lot of people don’t know about it, but it’s been around for decades.
It’s called BioGeometry. Look it up. It’s been mind blowing. I did their online course, the foundational course, it’s a very intensive science. I mean, it goes into quantum physics and sacred geometry and IR architecture, sound, light, cynematics. Its mind blowing. It’s very intense. I’m not going to do the advanced level because I’m so interested. But of course, this is my profession, health and wellness and all that.
But the CHEK Institute is also so gangbusters about it, that they’re going to incorporate it as part of their training somehow. So, it’s not a CHEK product, but there’s somehow going to expand and envelope the practitioners that are trained through the CHEK system can also, they’re going to encourage them to get this certification education as well, because it’s such a beautiful compliment and adjunct to diet, nutrition, lifestyle, exercise. It’s such a beautiful natural expansion of that, that they’re going to encourage that.
Jacquie Capstick:
So, what is it exactly? So, somebody comes to… So, you’re a practitioner, you’ve done one of the courses. So, I come to see you and what happens? How do you-
Amy Fournier:
To be trained as an actual practitioner is a much higher level. Well, what it is, is it’s balancing, it’s harmonizing energy. Okay? So, as you know, everything is energy, right? Which is hard for people to wrap their brain around because my head, I touch it, it’s hard. It’s matter. But, how do we explain love? Like, love is an energy, but we can’t touch it. It’s not tangible.
So, it’s can be hard for people, and even like Chi life force, it’s an energy. But it’s same energy, but it’s the same energy. It’s just as legitimate as that chair, you’re sitting on. Right? But one sense of energy is vibrating at a denser rate. So, it’s more matter than the other Chi life force energy. Okay?
So, what Bio Geometry does is it helps to harmonize all the energy in your environment that you mostly likely can’t even see is affecting you. And that’s done through shape, colors, sound, all these different things and they developed a whole system to do that. I’m probably not going to be the best person to explain it. Obviously, it says a little esoteric for me. I’m virtually pretty green on this myself, but I can give you a quick example.
So, everybody’s aware of electromagnetic radiation from our computers, our cell phones, right? So non-native EMFs, Electromagnetic Frequencies. Just because you can’t see that right now, with people listening on their phone or on their headset or their YouTube on their computer. Just because you can’t see doesn’t mean you’re not being bombarded by electrical rays right now, which are affecting every cell in your body.
But nevertheless, they’re very real. So, these invisible rays can affect you adversely, and they do. They’re causing all kinds of emotional, mental disturbances in people. People aren’t able to sleep. People are getting dehydrated. It’s really ruining people’s health. The blue light from the screens are really disrupting our penal gland, which is such a master gland in the body for so many functions.
So, Bio Geometry helps to regulate the environment. So, all these forces aren’t basically bombarding you and screwing up your mind, body and making you unhealthy or sick or overweight or whatever it may be. It’s an amazing science. It really is, but it takes a lot of study because it’s quite complicated.
Jacquie Capstick:
And so, for somebody who… So, when you go to have this, you’re learning. It’s like you’re going, and you’re learning about it. You don’t go and be treated..my Fournier:
If you hire a practitioner, yes, they could come in your home and balance your home. So, your home might be on fault lines, or you might have excessive electromagnetic radiation coming in through your house, through your routers. So, you can’t sleep. And they can come in and balance your home. They develop different signatures and different things that you can put in your home that balances the home. And they work.
They’re unbelievable. You can’t argue with results. You see the before and after, and you’re like, “Wow, it’s like a different place.” But to answer your question, people can start even just with their books. They have books. If you look up Bio Geometry, I’m hoping to even have them on my podcast one day, if I can get them, they’re just in such demand because they’re working in schools and governments, and they’re really going strong.
But people can start with just the book or even go to their website and download some of the free articles, biogeometry.com, I believe, and just hit English because they’re based in Cairo, Egypt. And start with that. And if that peaks your interest, I would then think about jumping into the online course which they offer several times a year, and just see where it takes you. But even buying the book or downloading the articles is going to have you that much ahead of everybody else.
Jacquie Capstick:
That’s great stuff, actually.
Amy Fournier:
Absolutely.
Jacquie Capstick:
And I think I’ve had an experience of that through our natural path. We were in transition of houses and we were on a property and it had a river running through. It was like a five-acre parcel and had a river running through it. And wherever my kids were in the anyways, he’s into this stuff. But I didn’t realize that this is what it was. Where she was sleeping at the river, the way it was running, that it was affecting her and explain something actually because I was like, “Okay, what?” And it was the thing. And so we had to sleep in a different room, and it really did make the difference. So this is really real stuff, right?
Amy Fournier:
Yep. And you know what too Jacquie, your example was perfect. You said it much better than I did. And that’s a perfect example. But I’ll tell you what, this stuff is new to us, but it’s not new to humanity. And what we’re finding is you will see if you’ll get the book or whatever is that, ancient cultures knew this stuff. I mean, all this stuff has been lost on our current society.
We just got away from all that, but ancient cultures do, I mean, how do you think the pyramids were built? All the things that, how could they find water? And I think if you search in architectural digs, the same sites would have churches, mosques, and temples all in the same location because they felt the fault lines and they could feel the energy and the animals would go there. And how did the animals know? Because it had such a high life force and they would avoid other areas.
So ancient cultures were in tune with nature. They weren’t even in tune with nature, they thought of themselves as nature. There was no separation. So, they were in alignment with it. It was part of their whole being. And we have lost touch with that. So, I love these types of courses and programs and teachings and sciences that are helping remind people of this heritage and knowledge that we have had, that we can tap back into to help the quality of our lives and hopefully save the planet too. And then in the meantime.
Jacquie Capstick:
I love this stuff as well. Like this is my… Bring it on, right? That science and the understanding of it is phenomenal.
Amy Fournier:
Well, I’ll tell you what, my friend, I just did you a big favor because you are going to be flipping out when you look into this BioGeometry and you’re like, “Amy, I love this.” So, yes, have fun.
Jacquie Capstick:
I love that stuff so much. It’s almost like food for me.
Amy Fournier:
It is. It’s spiritual food. And like I said earlier in the show that our mental diet is just as important as our physical diet. Just as important. And yes, for your weight as well, because your thoughts can make you fat. And I don’t mean because you’re like, “Oh, I want cake.” I mean, because that stress and cortisol tape running all the time in your body is not good for your nervous system and will screw up your hormones, which not only results in more belly fat, but also will increase your appetite. So, there’s a lot to that, that fit figuratively, and literally our thoughts affect our physical body.
Jacquie Capstick:
Yes. Do you know the statement of Joseph Brady? It’s on the wall. We go to this Pilates, plate a sentence like, your body is a projection, a mirror of your thought. So whatever you think your body is, is what it becomes. So if you say, “Oh, I’m feeling heavy.” You get to feel heavy. And it’s just so true. We just are not… that’s the whole thing. It’s just becoming aware of-
Amy Fournier:
Yes.
Jacquie Capstick:
Don’t say you might think it or whatever, but if you say it then you’re manifesting it. Right?
Amy Fournier:
Yes. And to that point, the belief thing, because a big part of my show too, in my work at this point in my life, now that I’m over 50, is that the whole anti-aging thing and the power of what you believe is going to happen. The power of expectation, and the power of… I’m always telling, I used to tell my students at my club and I just tell all my audience or whatever that: “You have to differentiate between what is normal and what is typical”.
Because unfortunately in our society, in this day and age, what we think of as normal aging is unfortunately the typical, but it’s not normal. It’s not normal to get fat as you get older. It’s not normal to wake up every day and have aches and pains. It’s not normal to lose your passion as you get older. It is not normal. It might be typical. It might be what’s happening because it’s what we see around us, but that’s just a sad commentary on the state of affairs. It doesn’t mean that’s how it needs to be or how it used to be for other cultures. Okay?
Again, as a woman, getting older and seeing my skin change, my body changed, my interest changed. My energy changed the way people treat me change that I have to remember that I’m not going to open a magazine or look around me and accept that I’m going to expect this now on my 53rd birthday coming up in a few months. I don’t accept that. That’s not going to be my life. I know how I want to live and how I want to feel.
And I have no problem with getting older, because it sure beats the alternative, but I definitely want to get better as I get older and things are going to change. But I can still keep my quality. And I want to keep my wanting to be alive in my engagement in life, just as high. And certainly not let anybody limitation or inability stop me from doing anything. From traveling or hiking or anything like that. Or having energy to see my friends or play with my niece or, you know what I mean? And that’s all lifestyle and it starts with your mindset.
It starts with knowing that this can happen, that this is possible and that’s why I love like amazing female role models like you. Women need to see other women that are doing it. And like we mentioned earlier in the show, it’s about learning from success, learning from people who’ve got it. And seeing it’s possible is very, very powerful. So we need to be the example.
Jacquie Capstick:
You know what? I had an experience of that. And I was in a very low point in my life and I went on a Joe Dispenza 10-Day Mediterranean Cruise.
Amy Fournier:
Wow.
Jacquie Capstick:
And my daughter and I went to champagne, one of the day trips and sat with this lady. I can’t remember her name even and a gentleman. It was like a 10 minute, “Well, this is my daughter.” So, it was like a quick, excuse me, a quick synopsis of, “Do you have any other kids?” “Yes.” So it was kind of one of those. And I ran into her a few times on the ship, and great lady and one of the last days we couldn’t dock because it was too stormy. And I had my little canyon cards out that I had gotten that I just thought were just the best thing, so I brought them up for a couple of my friends that I’d met.
Next thing I knew we had kind of like a hub coming around. Like everybody wanted… And they’re so powerful that when people were reading them, it was really just touching base. While I noticed that she had piqued her head in and left. Anyways, I left shortly thereafter and I walked past the Spa, the gym on my way to go and for some reason, I just walked into the gym and looked around because I felt like I wanted to go in there. But I was kind of feeling tired from all the experience.
Well, she walks around the corner at the same time as I walk in and she had just gotten off of the treadmill and she was soaking wet. And as she walked from the quarter, she literally went… and literally fell. I grabbed her, I was holding her, she was crying. Full of sweat, I didn’t know what was going on, but she’s like, “Oh my God, I haven’t run for like some 10, 15 years because of the pain.” She goes that, “I sat and listened to your story. And I thought, if she’s doing that, then I can do this.”
And so just through the understanding of the work that Joel was teaching, she got on the treadmill that day, she walked, left, didn’t pull the card, she went and put herself on the treadmill and she said, “I just asked myself, I think I’ve just healed myself. I walk around and I turn and then it’s you.” And it was like… and she just started bawling. So I’m holding her and hugging her.
And so, it made me realize that, I’m still climbing my way out of the depths of where I was, but the fact that, that changed her life, and I had no idea. It was a 10-minute conversation and it really was a brush over, but it is important. I don’t know, you hear, or you have those experiences and it does. If there’s just one person that hears that, it’s that one person that if they didn’t have the information that they had prior. Right?
Amy Fournier:
So true. Jacquie, I feel like we never know when we’re helping people. And that’s why just being you and being the person that you want to be all the time, you just never know how you might be helping someone. And when you’re helping someone just by being true to yourself. And I know too that’s happened to me so many times that, and I’m sure even when it’s your show, you don’t know who you’re helping and when you’re helping. And you’re probably helping when you don’t think you are, and that’s what it’s all about. It’s just the ripple effect.
Jacquie Capstick:
And not looking for it, just knowing that it has fingers of service and not letting the ego jump in for validation, I guess.
Amy Fournier:
Yes. Yes. And that’s something I had to learn too the hard way is, just wanting like approval and that validation, like, “Am I doing it right? Am I doing it? Did you like it? Did you like it? Did it help you?” And it’s like, I guess that’s the blessing of getting older and that you realize that… Well, I had a hard time too because I think in the health industry, they tell you to be of service. But you can’t be of service if you’re not serving yourself.
And I had a hard time with the selfish service thing back and forth, selfish service. Am I being selfish? But they’re not mutually exclusive, but most importantly, I think particularly women have to remember it’s not selfish to make yourself happy and to take care of yourself. It’s actually selfish if you don’t, because you can’t be your best self. And you’ll end up subconsciously resenting people around you, if you don’t. So that’s a whole another issue. That’s probably a whole separate part, yes.
Jacquie Capstick:
That’s a very big important issue though.
Amy Fournier:
Huge.
Jacquie Capstick:
Because it’s everything right there.
Amy Fournier:
It’s everything.
Jacquie Capstick:
I will spend my next especially… I deal with this all the time. So, it’s very important what you’re saying.
Amy Fournier:
Yeah. We probably should schedule a show just for you and I to go back and forth about that because we have about 20 of our girlfriends on it, because it’s the struggle I think and I don’t want to sound sexist, but I think women struggle a little bit more than men with that because we’re raised to be nurturers and to sacrifice ourselves, take care of everybody else. Right?
I like to call myself a reformed people-pleaser. It’s gotten me into so much trouble just overriding what I wanted to do because of trying to make people happy. It drove me right into a midlife crisis and a health crisis. So, we learned the hard way. I came out the other end, and now I’m still trying to find the balance between enough self-care, and self-love and saying no, and finding my voice and all that stuff.
And my show has helped me do that. And just making progress as I go, just trying to be loving for others and of service to others, but also myself, because I really didn’t even realize how much I was omitting myself from that equation. I was not loving myself. I mean, how sad that is, it sounds crazy to say, but I really just wasn’t.
And the why behind what you’re doing, are you helping others because you want them to like you, or you want to feel good because you’re being of service or are you helping others because you are just bursting to give that love? The why is essential, and that tells you a lot about the motivation behind it.
Jacquie Capstick:
I’ve just been learning a lot about that is the biggest question to ask on a daily basis. Like why? Because that’s your motivation too, right?
Amy Fournier:
And that helps all those people who can’t say no, right? The ones that feel bad when they say no to people, it’s like, if you say, yes, think about what is the, why am I saying yes. Do you really want to do it, or you’re saying yes because you don’t want to upset this person by saying no? There’s the why. That’s the big, big, big difference. And then you’re fooling yourself if you think it’s not going to come back to bite you eventually.
Jacquie Capstick:
Yeah. Being a hairstylist since service for 30 years. I hear you.
Amy Fournier:
Yeah. You were trying to make everybody happy, right?
Jacquie Capstick:
Oh yeah. Because yeah, that’s what you do, right?
Amy Fournier:
Yeah.
Jacquie Capstick:
Goodness. Where do you see yourself in 10 years?
Amy Fournier:
Oh my gosh. 10 years. Well, let’s hope the planet is still here at the rate we’re all going. Gosh, I see myself smiling on a beach somewhere with a bunch of people I love and a beautiful environment and feeling very happy with the path I’ve chosen and that I’ve really helped a lot of people and made a significant impact on the world of sharing truth and love and helping people be seen and valued and heard, and I’m healthy and I’m fit. And I feel just very much aligned with spirit, and looking forward to the next 10 years of my life.
Jacquie Capstick:
Nice. And if you had some advice to give your 19-year-old self, what would that be?
Amy Fournier:
Oh my gosh. Well, pretty much this whole conversation! I guess just listen to this conversation with Jacquie and Amy again: about making yourself happy and not wearing so much what other people think and that you have got to keep yourself in the equation of your priorities, and not feeling guilty about it. And most of all to somehow find the courage to truly be who you are, no matter what push back you’re getting, even if it’s from people very close to you.
And that can hurt sometimes. If family members or people that you look up to are important to you are really not encouraging your uniqueness to come through and to live, that somehow, you’ve got to do it anyway and fight for it anyway because we come into this earth alone. We are independent souls. We’re all one, but we’re still an independent soul. And you’re going to leave this earth alone. And at the end of the day, you have to be who you really are. Not what other people want you to be.
Even if it’s for good intentions, even if they have good intentions and they think they know what’s best for you, you have to be you. And be you as soon as you can, because you’re going to be a lot happier. And you’ll find your people, you’ll find your people cause like finds like.
Jacquie Capstick:
That’s great advice.
Amy Fournier:
It’s the truth. That’s what I wish I knew because I’m doing it now at 52. And I still got ways to go, but I’m doing it now. And it’s not going to always be easy. That’s for sure. You might be alone for a while. And as women, you have to be okay with being alone. And remember, we’re not really alone, but you have to, because until you’re super clear on who you are, and what you’re about, and what you want, all that relationship can never work, it just can’t work because you’re changing too much.
And who you are today is going to be different five years from now. So how are you going to be in a marriage for a lifetime when you’re not even the same person, or you don’t even know who the hell you are or you’re being who you thought everybody wanted you to be. And then all of a sudden you start finding your true self as you immature, and you’re a different person.
So, that’s why I feel like it really starts with finding out and having the courage to be who you really are. And that might require you to stand alone for a while, and then suffer a little bit as you find your people and you find your feet and you find your way, but that is going to make you stronger. And it’s going to give you more conviction and it’s going to give you more depths and more self-trust, and more self-independence to stand and withstand, and attract people worthy of you. So, it’s a necessary growing pain to get to the ultimate price.
Jacquie Capstick:
Growing pain. Yeah, and it is a pain because everybody wants to be in the box, so they don’t stand out. Nobody’s don’t know about, right?
Amy Fournier:
Yeah. And they don’t want to be in pain, so they don’t want to grow through it, but you got to grow through it and go through it. And like I tell people too, you’re suffering either way. You’re suffering because you’re not doing it. And you’re afraid of suffering because of the growing pain of breaking out and doing it. So you’re going to suffer either way. You might as well pick the one that’s going to get you somewhere, rather than spinning the same tape of suffering and just being stuck. Right?
Jacquie Capstick:
Well, and I think it’s quite exhilarating when you take the other one, when you take the road that you’re scared to take. There’s a lot of good that comes just from this experience, doing this podcast, walking through here, it’s very liberating.
Amy Fournier:
Agreed. Like you, the podcast for me was anticipated, but has been a revelation for me in a new shot in the arm of inspiration and motivation for me, this new direction. And so far, I’m loving it. And then particularly because it got me to connect with people like you.
Jacquie Capstick:
I love it. What else would you like our audience to know?
Amy Fournier:
Well, those are the pretty much the most important things, another thing, if they want to check out my show, it’s called Awakening Aphrodite. It’s everywhere you can find podcasts. And then I have of course my website with all my work over the decades and that’s just my name, which is amyfournier.com: so that’s A-M-Y, “F” as in “fox”, O-U-R-N-I-E-R .com. And everyone can take my online fitness classes too! I teach yoga and Zumba and Vixen virtually on my on-demand studio.
Oh, and also, I write free articles and I’m just always trying to share- like you, with all the wonderful teachers and practices that I’ve come across that have helped me and others, because I just feel like we’re all in this together. And the more we can commune with each other and share the better. And then my social media is “FitAmyTV”, which is “F-I-T A-M-Y-T-V” on Instagram and YouTube.
Jacquie Capstick:
That’s awesome. I will make sure that all your information is posted with our video interview today.
Amy Fournier:
Thank you.
Jacquie Capstick:
Thank you so much, you’re an amazing, amazing woman. Definitely a leader and one to aspire to.
Amy Fournier:
Likewise.
Jacquie Capstick:
Thank you for being that, because we need to be this, right?
Amy Fournier:
Yes.
Jacquie Capstick:
Yeah.
Amy Fournier:
Yes. I think the world is ready and right back at you Jacquie, I feel the same.
Thank you for having me.
